Discipline of Arts & Music
4 Our Kids
Q. My child won’t practice the piano even though we are spending $60 monthly for lessons. He won’t do his homework, either. Any suggestions?
Answer:
Children “learn” Discipline
Teaching children discipline to learn the arts or music is a lost art in our culture. In fact, Japanese or Korean parents think we are nuts! They can’t imagine allowing a child to dictate what he or she wants to do. In their culture children are not “asked” if they will practice violin or learn their multiplication tables. It is required and expected that they do their homework and practice. The cost of lessons is irrelevant to a child’s point-of-view.
Becoming Disciplined Adults
No child sits down at the piano and practices on their own. That’s because they are children – not adults. It is up to parents to set aside time for a child to practice. It is up to parents to make sure children do their homework, learn how to add and learn their multiplication tables. If a parent will not require a child to be disciplined at such tasks they will not grow up to become disciplined adults, either.
Dumbed-Down Nation
Sadly, we are now a nation of underachievers. Other countries view Americans as undisciplined and dumbed-down. Employers know that if they want truly skilled engineers or doctors, for example, they will find them in India or Asia – not America. If you don’t believe this just look into what our children had to learn in elementary school 75 years ago. You will be shocked!
All Pleasure & No Work
Can you imagine allowing a child to eat brownies and ice cream for breakfast, lunch, snacks and dinner? No? Then why would you allow them to do whatever is pleasurable to them moment by moment in other areas of their lives?
The Bible warns, “The rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a child left to himself disgraces his mother” (Proverbs 29:15).
Encourage Developing Skills
It seems the only thing parents usually encourage is sports. Children learn how to swing a bat and do other things required in sports. Why? Because kids don’t want to look foolish in front of their peers or their parents.
That is because all too often children have become an extension of their parents’ egos. It is the parents who want a child to succeed at basketball and who don’t care about science, math, music or other acquired and learned skills. So a child is really doing what his parent wants.
Ouch!
Parents might want to take their “cue” from this. Encourage your children to play the piano in front of family members and friends. Encourage and praise them for playing songs you enjoy. Take them to Christian concerts and fun music festivals in your area.
We can guarantee your child will not be playing soccer by age 21. But, they may enjoy playing Christmas carols at the piano and attending concerts with their own children when they are adults – if you provide the tools for them to learn now.
Music from God
God created us to keenly feel the emotional impact from music, song and dance. In fact, Jubal is noted as the “father of those who play the lyre and pipe” (Genesis 4:21).
Music was so important to God that Temple musicians were set aside to provide their own music and choirs in order to bring magnificent praise to God. Dancing, rejoicing, singing, and musicians regularly added joy and heartfelt music to acts of worship. Temple worship was not complete without it.
There were numerous stringed, wind and percussion instruments as well as talented choirs who contributed their talents to these festivities. (See 2 Chronicles 29:25, Nehemiah 12:27-43, and other referenced passages in your Bibles).
Wise Parenting
It is wise parenting to help your children develop good skills in doing their homework, practicing a musical instrument, studying the Bible and developing sports abilities. Without your help and encouragement they probably won’t do it on their own. God created us to be multifaceted individuals with numerous modes of expression. Music is an important part of that.
All parents must remember the Bible’s wise advice:
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“He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him” (Proverbs 13:240).
“Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it” (Proverbs 22:6).
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Parents, get involved in all of your children’s activities and don’t allow kids to “rule” over what they will or won’t do. That’s your job!
Your children will thank you for it later.
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Sources Cited:
Ryken, Leland, Wilhoit, and Tremper Longman III. 1998. Dictionary of Biblical Imagery Downers Grove, ILL: InterVarsity Press.
Ryrie Study Bible, NASB. 1996. Chicago: Moody.